The Last Obstacle to Awakenng
"The conceit of self (mana in Pali) is said to be the last of the great obstacles to full awakening. Conceit is an ingenious creature, at times masquerading as humility, empathy, or virtue. Conceit manifests in the feelings of being better than, worse than, and equal to another. Within these three dimensions of conceit are held the whole tormented world of comparing, evaluating, and judging that afflicts our hearts. Jealousy, resentment, fear, and low self-esteem spring from this deeply embedded pattern. Conceit perpetuates the dualities of “self” and “other”—the schisms that are the root of the enormous alienation and suffering in our world. Our commitment to awakening asks us to honestly explore the ways in which conceit manifests in our lives and to find the way to its end"
– Christina Feldman, "Long Journey to a Bow"
The Beauty of the Way It Is
August 26, 2011: Tricycle Daily Dharma
"As an actor, fear comes up because I want to do a good job, an enlightened piece of work. You get attached to that, you overwork it, you overthink it. Then you come to the set, and people aren’t saying the lines as you imagined. It’s raining, and its supposed to be sunny. You thought you were invited to a cha-cha party, you’ve learned the steps, and they’re dancing the Viennese waltz! You can spend a lot of energy being upset, or you can get with the program—it’s that right effort thing—get the beauty of the way it is."
-Jeff Bridges, "The Natural"
From Henri Nouwen
Monday July 11, 2011: A Time to Receive and a Time to Give
It is important to know when we can give attention and when we need attention. Often we are inclined to give, give, and give without ever asking anything in return. We may think that this is a sign of generosity or even heroism. But it might be little else than a proud attitude that says: "I don't need help from others. I only want to give." When we keep giving without receiving we burn out quickly. Only when we pay careful attention to our own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual needs can we be, and remain, joyful givers.
There is a time to give and a time to receive. We need equal time for both if we want to live healthy lives.
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To enter into solidarity with a suffering person does not mean that we have to talk with that person about our own suffering. Speaking about our own pain is seldom helpful for someone who is in pain. A wounded healer is someone who can listen to a person in pain without having to speak about his or her own wounds. When we have lived through a painful depression, we can listen with great attentiveness and love to a depressed friend without mentioning our experience. Mostly it is better not to direct a suffering person's attention to ourselves. We have to trust that our own bandaged wounds will allow us to listen to others with our whole beings. That is healing.
-- Henri Nouwen
See the Needs of Others
Any time we feel sorrow, any time we are touched by the suffering of another being, we reconnect with our own beating heart and the quality of lovingkindness. When empathy spontaneously arises, we sense the power of love as a blessing revealed by adversity. How embarrassing it is to see how preoccupied we have been with our own petty concerns! Seeing how affection stirs people to acts of selflessness inspires us to extend ourselves as well. With lovingkindness we see the needs of others and respond. At the same time we need to take care of ourselves, for we too need love and healing.
-Judy Lief, "Welcome to the Real World"
"...an incorrect perception of reality inevitably leads to suffering."
This was taken from the May 4, 2011, Tricycle Daily Dharma, entitled The Way Things Are, from Matthieu Ricard's "Why Meditate?"
"One of the main pursuits of Buddhism is to bridge the gap between the way things appear and the way things are. That approach does not come just from a curiosity to investigate phenomena. It arises from the understanding that an incorrect perception of reality inevitably leads to suffering."
April 25, 2011: Tricycle Daily Dharma: Use Inconvenience to Discover Equanimity
Situations of inconvenience are terrific areas to discover, test, or develop your equanimity. How gracefully can you compromise in a negotiation? Does your mind remain balanced when you have to drive around the block three times to find a parking space? These inconveniences are opportunities to develop equanimity. Rather than shift the blame onto an institution, system, or person, one can develop the capacity to opt to rest within the experience of inconvenience.
-Shaila Catherine, "Equanimity in Every Bite"
